Happy holidays everyone! It feels good to be home. It was an interesting last few days leading up to getting here though and if you have been reading our journals on whatismae.com you might have read about benji's and my adventure. On the way home from Hawaii to Va I had a one day lay over in LA to get a tattoo (as seen above) finished. Long story short, after close to four hours of tattooing I hit crazy traffic on the way to the airport and missed my flight. I could have waited for the next available standby flight but there were 83 people ahead of me on the standby list and the lady at the counter said it could be up to two days until that happened. Two days of sleeping in the airport with a fresh tattoo sounded pretty awful so I asked when the next flight I could get a ticketed spot on would be. She looked at the computer for a moment and looked at me and slowly said, "Christmas Eve."
It could have turned out really bad. I had no place to stay, no car, and a sore stomach. Fortunately it all worked out better than I could have hoped for and poor Benji ended up also getting stuck at the airport that day. We ended up making the best of it and seeing some movies and eating good food (Gyu Kaku, Hungry Cat) with good friends. I highly recommend the movie The Good Shepherd. I think its a modern classic. Outstanding writing, directing and acting.
On the morning of our departure Benji and I went on one last skate adventure in the parking garage and climbed to the top of a sign on the roof and took some farewell pictures. Goodbye LA and again, happy holidays!

At the risk of being redundant, here is another round of photos. I took a trip around around the island and this is what I found. My favorite spot was this little beach called Makapu'u. At least I think thats how its spelled. I am a notoriously bad speller. Who knows:)

Tonight we returned to the ice pond to climb the waterfall. The sun had just sank below the horizon as we entered the pool and swam our way across the pond and over to the bottom of the falls. It was one of the most beautiful and natural feelings I have ever had. Climbing up the rocks as water fell all around us... I felt close to God. That sound... that sound of rushing water. You could FEEL the sound of the water hitting the rocks as it tumbled down. We got to the top only to find two more layers of falling water. We hiked back around through the jungle to this ledge. One by one we jumped down into the tiny pool of water below. The moment before I jumped was probably the closest I have ever felt to mortality. It took me a good two minutes to work the courage up and it didn't help that it was already dark outside... Then, I leaned forward, out over nothing, and flew.

Wake up...
You're only
Dreaming.
Incomplete pictures.
More going on than we think we
See.
Light divided
By a prism to show what's inside.
The earth is full of hints,
Pieces of a puzzle not yet put together,
A mystery given to us to solve.
I AM COMPELLED.
It fills the space between us in our
HOLY
Moments.
Its what happens when we stop and hold our breath.
When we live like life comes with death.
I AM swimming through a dream
Saturated colors in between...
The Chaos: The Order.

throw a stone through these reflections
scatter light in all directions
through the trees of revelation
painted by imagination
this time of day; this saturation
stillness leads to elevation
initiates acceleration
toward the beautiful: the destination

Here is a photographic account of the day today which consisted of a hike down into the jungle to a secret waterfall and rope swing.
1. A day trip to the ice pond.
2. The trip down was not meant for sandals.
3. Which way is up?
4. Everything is better in a Land Rover Defender. Thank you Matty for being kind enough to let me borrow the white one for my visit. Not a bad front yard either...

Pearl Jam/ U2 Part 1

I have to do this in two parts. The show saturday was so amazing that I have to report about it in two separate posts. I am not even kidding, either one of these two band's performances would have been the best show I have ever seen but to have them together in one night was...
Adam and I sat right in the section that this photograph (compliments of pearljam.com) is pointing at. We were joined by a stadium full of music lovers (including eight year-old Grant and his dad Danny who flew in from Boston to catch the show) and gathered together under the Hawaiian star filled evening sky.
I found this set list on the site as well.

Interstellar Overdrive, Corduroy, Life Wasted, Do The Evolution, Elderly Woman Behind The Counter In A Small Town, Big Wave, Even Flow, Hawaii 78, Better Man, World Wide Suicide, Given To Fly, Crazy Mary, Alive, Baba O'Riley

Elderly Woman Behind The Counter In A Small Town was so moving to me. I have heard it so many times but I have never heard it the way I heard it saturday night. I screamed along as loud as I could into the sky and every other person there was doing the same. For some reason it held me in a moment of reverence. I got lost in that feeling and floated there in a sea of voices calling out for the same resolution. Mine, tiny in comparison to the whole, was lifted by the rushing, rising waves of sound heaved into existence by the masses and mine was at once a drop... and an ocean.

"Elderly Woman Behind The Counter In A Small Town"

I seem to recognize your face
Haunting, familiar, yet I can't seem to place it
Cannot find the candle of thought to light your name
Lifetimes are catching up with me

All these changes taking place, I wish I'd seen the place
But no one's ever taken me
Hearts and thoughts they fade, fade away...
Hearts and thoughts they fade, fade away...

I swear I recognize your breath
Memories like fingerprints are slowly raising
Me, you wouldn't recall, for I'm not my former
It's hard when, you're stuck upon the shelf

I changed by not changing at all, small town predicts my fate
Perhaps that's what no one wants to see
I just want to scream...hello...

My god its been so long, never dreamed you'd return
But now here you are, and here I am
Hearts and thoughts they fade...away...
Hearts and thoughts they fade, fade away...
Hearts and thoughts they fade, fade away...

Hearts and thoughts they fade...away
Hearts and thoughts they fade...away
----------------

The highlight of the set for me though had to be Alive. He changed the words in the outro chorus to include the audience. "We're all still alive" Inviting us to celebrate our inclusion in the process of how the future unfolds. Be active. Be a part. Be a part of this glorious, greater whole. Be a drop and an ocean at the same time. We are not alone. We are not helpless. We are still alive. We are ALL still alive. The job is ours. Every day we wake up we choose, we act out, we decide. We are all still alive.

"ALIVE"
Son, she said, have I got a little story for you
What you thought was your daddy was nothin' but a...
While you were sittin' home alone at age thirteen
Your real daddy was dyin', sorry you didn't see him,
but I'm glad we talked...

Oh I, oh, I'm still alive
Hey, I, I, oh, I'm still alive
Hey I, oh, I'm still alive
Hey...oh...

Oh, she walks slowly, across a young man's room
She said I'm ready...for you
I can't remember anything to this very day
'Cept the look, the look...
Oh, you know where, now I can't see, I just stare...

I, I'm still alive
Hey I, but, I'm still alive
Hey I, boy, I'm still alive
Hey I, I, I, I'm still alive, yeah
Ooh yeah...yeah yeah yeah...oh...oh...

Is something wrong, she said
Well of course there is
You're still alive, she said
Oh, and do I deserve to be
Is that the question
And if so...if so...who answers...who answers...

I, oh, I'm still alive
Hey I, oh, I'm still alive
Hey I, but, I'm still alive
Yeah I, ooh, I'm still alive
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
-----------------

When the set was over, we looked at each other with nothing to say. Finally Adam broke the silence and said, "And, oh yeah...U2 is about to play."

I think this is amazing: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-798499834764717267

What is a will? Not the kind that sends money to people after you die but the other kind. The kind that lives inside of each of us when we make a choice. A choice. A value judgement. I want this. I will do this. I won't do this. I want this so bad that if it doesn't exist...I will make it.
Do you ever find yourself trapped inside of a cycle? I was created...now I am creating. Thats weird. Hmmm.
I find that everywhere I look I see the byproducts of various wills. Sometimes they compliment my will. Sometimes they are at war with my will. I can choose to overcome my will. I can use my will force my body to do things it doesn't naturally want to do; like exercise. Or I can use my will to force my mind to read and comprehend a few more pages when I really want to fall asleep. The stranger realms of will are territories of emotion and spirit. Take a second look around you and tell me what you see when you look at our entire existence as a collection of wills.

What else needs to be said...

So today I have packing up my stuff and getting ready to leave LA and the studio. I have been through a lot out here and I am ready for a chance to step back and see the bigger picture. That seems to be a theme in this record. All the little things coming together to make something new. I love it. I see it everywhere right now. And... what better place to reflect than Hawaii :) I am going to go take my adopted little brother Adam to see Pearl Jam open for U2 at the Aloha Stadium on December 9th because he has dominated at life and is graduating from college. Congratulations my friend! I will be staying with some of my favorite people in the world, Matty, Phil, and Aubry of the famed BAMP crew. Look out Hawaii...